Souvenirs:
ground

Hi! I hope this Christmas house walk finds you all well!! come on in to our little farm house on the prairie...

more than half my day is spent in this little corner of the world... the kitchen
my kitchen = my expression = my love for my family = and oh such good and tasty dishes...
we ALL get involved in the kitchen! it's my favorite room of the house



these little candy canes are being bagged up for sale in the shop today! check back later!!!

collecting those little tins, I have made a lot of little treats for the kids
cakes and tiny pies
one of the things I really have enjoyed, is collecting small things like that — after all... I AM surrounded by six little sets of feet scampering about the farmhouse all day:)
totally not complaining

thos candy canes are vintage wire ones and the coolest quick decorating thus far this year

this may not look like a Christmas kitchen... but simmering on the stove is some raw milk I'm heating up for baby Daniel, with my cup of tea steaping in the background, and the chalkboard proclaiming I need to slow down and enjoy these last few days of Advent

nature inspires this family of mine... this farmhouse... this soul

yes, that is the mini-conservatory Jason made for me to use in the potager... it's sitting next to and apple ladder... which is all resting peacefully on top of a table Jason also made using reclaimed barn wood

we've "freaked" out a few people with letting our Percheron horse Jordan roam the property free and eat the cool grass... and this picture simbolizes so much to me
freedom

instead of taking all the pine trimmings and making thick swags, I am leaving them raw
extending their life from outdoors right into our home
unpolluted

a bunch of lavender grens as well as pine branches surround Mary especially since it's the feast day of the Immaculate Conception! Dear blessed Mother... so gentle and kind... may I always give my all to others through sacrifice Mary... help me to be closer to your Son

the girl's room...
all vintagey turquoise + red and simply so fun & cute!

this house most certainly is never 'totally tidy'... especially when you give your daughter the freedom to create in her 'vintage horse room'

back downstairs, in our once dining room (now turned living room) pinecones, dried oranges and an eskewed lamp;)... things are not perfect here

Daniel even got some new stuffed toys I hand stitched this holiday season... I couldn't resist letting him have them before Christmas day! he also loves playing with my yarn balls like a little kitty

he sure does love his sister... what a blessing a big family is!!

that's the end of the house tour for me...
in case you missed stop #8, it is my very good personal friend, who literally lives just 30 minutes from the farm: Traci Thorson... she's our official photographer for the farm events and certain other publications...
as well as stop #10: blondienc who has a great blog!
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I'm so excited to present to you the very special project all of us here on the farm have been working on together... especially Jason and I

We've compiled some simple and traditional holiday recipes and easy to make gifts in this
E-BOOK

AVAILABLE THIS FRIDAY! December 9th!!
it is an online e-book!!! We are so very excited to share this with you! (more on the book tomorrow)
We also have something else to share!!

the winter 2011 collection of hand carved spoons from NA.DA.FARM
Jason has been hand carving spoons they are so beautiful and special each spoon is one of a kind made from his own two hands truly beautiful
100% made by hand from reclaimed timber from the farm and other local wood
organic in nature... organically finish
each piece is sealed with organic olive oil... the safest sealant for wood used in the kitchen

We are opening up shop once again for some very wonderful hand crafted items from both Jason and myself... tomorrow!!!

From all of us here at the farm... peace + blessings,

bare foot and pregnant wearing a babushka
if a rosary is in her basket (and if she looked like she just swallowed a basketball) then that sums me up right now...
always one foot forward, one grounded, and always looking back when i should be watching where i am going
(are those clams in her basket? i hate clams if so... let's pretend it's Hungarian peppers okay?)
your personal e-mails about my last post, on 'trust' were shocking in a good way
why? because when I write here, it's from my soul
-who i am -
i'm not thinking of pleasing you, the reader, but just writing like a journal
some of you inspire me however, and that is amazing since it's over the computer
and when you, the reader, acknowledge my sentiments, and actually read what i write, and leave me comments, or send me an email about how it changed your life, or made you feel, or think, well, it truly warms my heart and my soul... deeply
thank you... have a blessed Thanksgiving Holiday ~with or without turkey~ (just in case i don't "see" you here on the farm again this week)

us women are inundated with being a "self-sustaining organic only/entrepreneurial self sufficient/gourmet cooking genius/who should have their children in every activity possible/be an amazing photographer or blogger/totally fit with terrific hair/their own magnificent decorator who sews their own pillows,curtains and stencils galvanized buckets so she will have time for filling up the glass jars in the pantry lined perfectly and labeled with precision that she just about has to be perfect for this world or she feels worthless"

for real?

since when is is NOT okay to just be a mom?

do you ever hear your 13 year old daughter say: "I can't wait to be a Mom!"

well, if not, that could be because the amount of pressure that it takes to just be "totally amazing" according to what her mom might be pursuing could be the reason...

we, as mothers, should be a little less preoccupied with being perfect for this world, and instead think about being perfect for Him

that means, every single thing you do should be a decision of getting you to heaven

every. single. thing.

ask yourself before making any decision (and no, I don't mean should I wear the red sweater type of decision) "is this leading me towards being a saint?"

I think it's about time we get over ourselves

we aren't great

we aren't fantastic/amazing/magnificent

get over yourself

we are created in His image... but we sure muck it up with all the world don't we?

the only reason you are able to cook that amazing meal is because He gave you that gift — so thank Him

the only reason you are able to live in your house is because He gave you that gift — so thank Him

the only reason you are able to embrace your children is because He gave you those gifts — so thank Him

the only reason you are suffering inside, is because you are refusing to give Him thanks in good and bad, in gifts of both sacrifice and joy

which brings us back to being submissive... being humble... the word humility comes from the Latin word humilitas

humilitas is derived from the word humus... which means the earth

humility it truth... because it shows the truth about ourselves

is it hard to just be a mom? do you see other women/moms succeeding in their own business or even just succeeding in their decorating?? blogging???

not only is that jealousy, but it is surely not being humble

the depth of your faith = the depth of your humility

*oh boy*

that one made me stop in my tracks when that came to mind... how often I fall and how often I have to get back up

i am working from the ground up... from humus to heaven

When we were children we were grateful to those who filled our stockings at Christmas time. Why are we not grateful to God for filling our stockings with legs? ~G.K. Chesterton

what G.K.Chesterton told me through this quote was that gratitude is simple and comes from the most basic needs of this life... how I need to remind myself of this fact daily... that the most basic needs are what we need to thank God for even legs
or in my kitchen... peppers

As I am stringing up the last of the peppers that we covered under our makeshift frost protector, I can't help but look at all the colors and variety now hanging down like jewels from our kitchen windows...
out the window it certainly looks like winter with branches bare, but as the trees loose their leaves and fall to the ground to blanket and help protect the flower beds below with their natural mulch: gratitude is there
gratitude is there in the morning with cutting boards waiting at the ready

gratitude is there with a clean kitchen and my tea kettle whistling

as Chesterton again had said: "Gratitude is the mother of all the virtues." from gratitude... it all starts... all other things flow... and all this week will be a self-enhancing inward journey for myself to find more and more gratitude amongst my life here on the farm...

in order to say 'thank you' properly, we have to first slow down and figure out how we would like to thank our Creator... for our life...
let's start with a thank you letter...
there is too much going on in my head at most times, but if I slow down and take out some writing paper (nothing fancy), I can begin to open up my mind to take in all that is going on... start the process of gratitude
today I will be starting that letter to Him
advent is right around the corner and I want to be fully prepared for the feast!! a lot to plan, yes, but if I break it up into small bits (starting with a thank you letter), more grace... more joy will follow
peace + blessings,

being aware of the truth

embracing the truth the truth of why i am here

i am not here to rally for one candidate or endorse his agendas

i am not here to stick up those signs and bite my nails in anticipation

i have never been that involved in politics... which doesn't mean i don't care

i care deeply for six little ones and the lives they will have ahead

i care for those unborn in their mother's womb who don't have a voice
i care for the ability for me to worship the way i want

being aware of my freedom couldn't be more evident than today

my hope does not come from a man

though i could go on and on... all of it is basically complaints at this point for those who were not aware of the truth, who decidedly kept themselves blinded to the truth, and who continue to deny the truth

only Jesus said He was the truth

Pontius Pilate asked the question to Jesus: “what is truth” it turned out that Pontius was staring The Truth right in the face and didn’t even know it

i am not in the corner being attacked, but am standing up with both feet firmly on the ground

ready

i am aware of the dangers

i am aware of the battle
my hope does not come from a man, but from Him alone...

the pressure is there to constantly "be in the moment"
{ to experience everything
{ to taste it
{ to feel it
{ smell it
{ hear it
{ to see... and touch it...

the wipers noisily squeaked right left... right left... the car eerily quiet though all but Jason was with me... no music — just the hum of the wheels upon the highway and the now annoyingly squeaking noise of the wipers...
the wipers were turned on before the funeral... when the air was thick with dew and mist from the heat of the ground mingled with the complete chill in the air that seemed to creep through the marrow of my bones to reach the part of my soul that has been void
parking almost 3 blocks from the entrance to the old brick cathedral for Mass... a Requiem Mass... a Mass for a woman... a Mass in honor of a woman... a Mass to connect heaven and earth... a place to connect me to God... to fill that void
a valid word but an invalid feeling
nothing black to mourn her loss than the boots that I have been trying to replace for the past two months and the circles under my eyes
a crying child in the arms of a familiar face of a mother I knew before stops me as I gaze into the standing room of the Mass ive amount of people in the cathedral... thoughts of reassurance not this many people even know me crash through my head as I try to listen to her tell me "there is a few pews... in the very front"
sending my 14 year old son to the front with instructions to look back at me with a slight nod to tell me to venture up to the front with five of his siblings... I can only think of praying to the good Lord to keep the baby quiet and my three old well behaved as I notice the pew open is right behind the pall bearers... a knot settles into my throat as I see Eileen covered in a black clothe hand embroidered by nuns and two foot candles lit and reaching towards the sky... not hearing any noises except that crying child from the familiar face in the back of the church now sounding like a mile away
I know Mark is sitting on the left hand side... Mary's side of the church for us, but from God's perspective to the right... the right side of the church where sorrow lays still
Gregorian chant fills the space and enters up with the incense to encompass that moment... that void starts to fill with more sights and sounds of the Mass... of knowing God is here... truly present... just like Eileen... present under the veil while she sees Him... her veil has lifted... her void is gone... all of her senses are useless... i realize so are mine and everyone else... how alike we all are...
we search out our lives trying to find completeness... to "feel" complete... when in order to do so we must empty ourselves to be united with eachother...
regardless of where I was Tuesday, you were somewhere else wherever I was in 1983, you were somewhere else you are somewhere else, and I am here
here truly present wanting to join with others... the mass becoming the Mass

flocking together and not caring for things of this world... knowing we will be provided for

and that's more than okay

rest in peace knowing you are not alone rest in peace seeing... hearing... tasting the M ass
being on the right side chanting like everyone else

it's okay
no need to worry

peace + blessings to all... especially to Eileen's friends and family,
our deepest sorrow...

to help fight the battle of cancer, please visit here

you are on your way through life

i didn't know you

i don't know the day or life you have had
we are seperated by many miles and a few years

while i was wearing leg warmers you were swaddled in your mother's arms

would it matter if i knew your name + background + the shoe size you wear?

i didn't know you
you might be a passerby... your on your way while i am on mine

the nest you have woven amongst the golden hues and gray skies will never be forgotten

i stitched it for them, and they hung it in their window... so sweet... if you were here this past weekend, you would have noticed a turquoise truck + camper on the old barn foundation

on Thursday of last week, my oldest son and I were headed to our neighbor's farm to get some straw to lay down in the prairie lounge... we passed this turquoise truck... hood open... one with his head in the engine, the other behind the wheel... I stopped to see if help was needed... no was the answer I received...

again, we passed them, now with our truck filled with the straw

I thought to myself how they looked familiar without knowing them... how I needed to get home and get to work... how if they really needed my help they would have said so right??

Jason left for work when I came home... but called me 45 minutes later telling me he was towing a couple to the farm who were stranded... not surprised, I put on my shoes to greet them onto the farm

She recognized me

We started talking... and talking... and talking... not knowing how our paths are so very similar in life... deep within our souls, our experiences...

If you saw a naturally beautiful soul behind the bakery counter at the sale this past weekend, it was her...
moving to their new home

passing by the farm but never leaving my heart

we are close enough in this world to see with our hearts and not our minds, or pre-conceived ideas

it's quite simple to realize that in this world help is always there for me... I am the one who needs to accept it

acceptance is love

no matter what — trust — love -

no matter what the age difference or demographics are
no matter if we both love baking and biking
no matter if we love the nature that surrounds us
no matter if both of the men in our lives are carpenters

there is much more in common with each and every person if you just stop to notice it...

age, tattoos, color of skin... it really doesn't matter when it comes to the human experience does it...

I feel so very blessed beyond measure that I met them... and that God had our paths cross... they have been for more than one reason... they were there for me and I hope I have been there for her... for them both...

peace + blessings,

The October event is right around the corner...
Jason and I are working hard to make the event special and unique for everyone visiting
(October 7th and 8th)
Part of the uniqueness to this past spring's event was hosting an art class with teacher/artist Jeanne Oliver. The class filled up quickly and a creative fun time was had by all who attended. (you can visit here to see photos of the past art class)
Creating... within an atmosphere of farm life... sharing... inspiration... memories together... on the prairie
under the skylights in the horse barn, and the sounds of the horses and chickens in the background, you will be able to learn from her artistic abilities with
and these lovely ladies will be here on the farm to guide you in this process... teach you how to create

~Jeanne Oliver ~
if you have met Jeanne, you will automatically have a smile on your face... Jeanne is not only creative, but such a peaceful soul — so joyful — and it's one of the qualities I admire and aspire to be myself...
and having her back to the farm to teach 3 classes this October 7th and 8th is so exciting...

Vintage Art Journal Class (12-2:30pm) Saturday, October 8th

You will take a variety of vintage elements and create a beautiful and usable art/writing journal. You will start with a vintage book and alter it to include vintage elements that make it reflect your own personal style. Each journal will be full of vintage papers and watercolor paper. All supplies will be provided but you are free to bring anything personal you would like to add. You will learn how to stamp onto metals and leathers, different photo transfer processes and mixed media techniques. You will also learn beginning art journaling techniques so you can start filling your journal with your own art. All of my classes give clear step by step directions. Even if you have never created art before you will leave with not only a new piece of art but the knowledge to continue your own art at home.
$58 ($50 if taken with the vintage mixed media art class)

Vintage Mixed Media Art Class (3-5pm) Saturday, October 8th
You will take a canvas and vintage elements to create a finished mixed media art piece. Each piece will include vintage papers, charcoal, pencil, paint and vintage hardware. You will learn different photo transfer processes, mixed media techniques and how to use water soluble pencils to create beautiful art. All supplies will be provided. You will leave with a completed vintage mixed media art piece on a door plate (escutcheon) stand. All of my classes give clear step by step directions. Even if you have never created art before you will leave with not only a new piece of art but the knowledge to continue your own art at home.

$58 ($50 if taken with the vintage art journal class)

To sign up for any of Jeanne's classes, send her an email at jeanneoli@hotmail.com with subject line: NaDa Farm Art Class

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~ Jennifer Rizzo ~
Most of you already know that I love this girl... and how much she has been a part of the last events...

I'm so excited to have her coming to teach 2 very unique classes!

Reflections of the prairie mixed media art class (9-11am) Saturday, October 8th

Bring your coffee and join in on a two hour class where we will create a mixed media mirrored art piece made from a magnifying glass using paper, decoupage medium and the inspiration of the peaceful surroundings. It starts with the 15 minute prairie walk/meditation to gather inspiration. Suitable for all skill levels, Each student will leave with a completed, unique art piece.

$38.00

To sign up for any of Jenifer's classes, send her an email at thecraftyhome@comcast.net with subject line: NaDa Farm Art Class

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~ Jeanne and Jen are teaching another class together ~
(1.5 hours 7:30 — 9 pm Friday, October 7th) There is such joy in simply creating, but there is something so fulfilling about being able share it with others as well. Have you always wanted to find ways to let your artwork shine or create paths to promote your unique creations?
This mini-class will cover ways to: -Remove the fear and take the steps you need towards being published in national magazines -Learn about the ease and tricks for opening an on-line Etsy or Web store -Get hints and information about what you need to open a booth in a co-op space or antique store -Sell or consign your items wholesale to retailers And more…..
$18 It includes 1 hour of pure information and ½ hour of Q and A time. Hosted by Jeanne Oliver and Jennifer Rizzo to sign up for this class, you can contact either Jennifer or Jeanne
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~ Jill Harris ~
Traveling from the shorses of Jersey to the farm!! This super talented lady is coming back to the farm to not only sell her one of a kind wares, but also teaching a jewelry class


Jill's class will be Friday, October 7th from 4-7pm

To sign up for Jill's class, you can contact her at: gypsyfleamarket@gmail.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Hotel discount information is coming soon!-

Can't wait to see you all again!!! and meeting some new people too...

xo+blessings,

how often I am in a constant state of control
my faith humbles me to the point of exhausting all resources within me and I seem to malfunction rather quickly

shut down

letting someone else take control... = what's for breakfast = how we garden = plans for the day = how to sort the laundry = what we'll pray on as a family
all this responsibility (and obviously much more than what I revealed) can be heavy upon my shoulders... but never a burden... just heavy... and sometimes too heavy where I seem to be crushed
like a dog with it's head out the window, the exhilarating feeling of being in a car, windows down, is freeing
maybe I'm saying that because I seriously don't get out that much... but that could just be my saving grace... the more I get out, the more I want out... but the more I pray... the more I want to pray
pushing the door open to the garden gate to go back up to the house, I looked back and my eyes saw my husband watering our newly planted asparagus patch, son was weeding, girl was swinging... big kids were at the last day of a Church retreat... the baby wiggled under my chin and the Holy Spirit rushed passed me as the wind feels with the windows down... the objects of my affection were closer than they appear
I started walking up the gravel path, my flip flops flipping on my heels, but my feet weren't touching the ground. My spirit was soaring with amazement — not being able to fully realize what was happening -
I parked myself upon the comfy cushy chair on the deck and held my baby close and nourished him physically. Completely letting the moment sink upon me.
= We are letting our life here be led by something stronger than our hands = The seasons and changes in weather guide our chores, duties, responsibilities
I am not in control, just along for the ride... and it's a gorgeous view

An honor to be chosen from Fifi O'Neill's new cookbook for an Italian publication...

From the Italian magazine "COUNTRY & COUNTRY"...

Conforto per corpo e anima it reads "Comfort for body and soul... "
3 out of the 6 photos are of me and Farm... all I can say is thank you!!!
there I am drizzling locally raised lamb shanks with olive oil and my rosemary from the garden above me are my kids and a few friends playing on the ancient oak tree swing on the south side of our grounds
and the farm to table style dinner in the bottom photograph, taken by Mark Lohman, under the pergola and table strewn with fresh food I made for our large party of friends, including Fifi herself at the head of the table... it was her birthday, and though I wanted to make her, her favorite dessert, bread pudding, my oven stopped working and so became another favorite, rhubarb compote with bourbon dressing served with slow churned vanilla ice cream
The recipes in the book are so very delicious, as Marylout Tapp and Jennifer Rizzo (bottom right photo above) will agree.
The settings are inspirational and the recipes fresh and delicious.
No wonder it is in Italian!!
My recipes for the farm to table dinner are all in the book, pictures of our farm and me preparing it as well...
a wonderful book
such a complete blessing to be a part of that!!

saying it in Italian is so much more beautiful... Conforto per corpo e anima!!

(almost as beautiful as Latin)
xo+delicious blessings,

is how to simplify

how to give more to my family in the garden and less from the store and even farmer's market

how to make a wood fired pizza oven and start cooking by fire more

how to congeal my thoughts into something substantial for you...

how to simplify

being happy with who I am = simplifying
staying home and making do = simplifying
not being swayed by what the world find to be valuable = simplifying
not worrying about the future = simplifying
eating out of my garden = simplifying

many people who I talk to about simplifying their lives start with something organic, like eating or supporting local farmer's markets

truthfully, the only way we, as individuals, can live simply is an individual decision... find out what is clouding your mind...

is it from the television? the computer? the shopping at "big box" stores??

Television is a waste of time for us... kids included

when looking out the window the other day, I noticed my oldest son walking around the grounds... alone...

not discontent or melancholy, but rather, just walking... he is a big thinker
(I have no idea where he gets that...)

so I asked him what he'd like to do this week, now that we are done with studies... a bike ride... camping... bowling...

I was all ears and rather eager to grab my keys and his water bottle and take him wherever he wanted to go...

'Mama... that all sounds like fun... but I like it here... (insert brother's name here) and I are planning on making a movie today in the woods... '

okay I thought... he'll change his mind... now that I planted this seed of inspiration and fun thoughts, he'll want me to take him later

nope

not one word

all i can think of is how to simplify

my thoughts

my life

me

xo+simple blessings,

Leaving yourself open and free to feel in the moment... that is what will cause your self to grow
I'm not saying abandon your morals and beliefs... on the contrary... you need those to keep yourself standing upright and better society and those around you

I'm talking about being in the moment
not judging others
seeing the beauty around you
it will change your life!!
This past weekend's sale/event confirmed that with not only me but my kids and my husband
Not everyone who came here is the same religion
Not everyone who shopped here had the same income
Not everyone who came here had the same background
But everyone who did come here chose to take the time to come here and be a part of the farm, for just a few hours up to a few days!!

If you are reading this, and the last post, and saying to your computer screen under your breathe (or even out loud to others or yourself) "Pah! What the heck is she talking about?? It was just a sale! buying stuff!!"
Well you are free to think what you want, but you aren't letting yourself "get it"
Why don't you get it?? Because you aren't listening to me and the other women and men who came here and feel the same why I do...
When you surround yourself with other people that are positive thinkers... who want to be a part of something good and happy... when you are outdoors looking at all the creativity and inspiration... watching people meet for the first time... being able to meet and tell people how much you read their blogs... now THAT is inspiring and is humbling to say the least to see that happen on our little ol' farm
If you have a blog, and in that blog you write about your life... your feelings... then you know what I mean
Blogging has really made a connection between people who wouldn't normally be able to connect... and considering I am the way I am, I attest what I have experienced ONLY by the grace of God.
("oh man... now anne marie is bringing God into this... oh brother")
Oh Brother is right!! There is no way I could experience what I am going through right now without the God's intervention... and I thank Him daily for allowing Jason and I to be able to have this opportunity and ability to share that with others...

xo+positive farm blessings,

gathering together for no other special reason except wanting to be outdoors... and with friends

that is what a picnic is all about

a favorite basket... something to lay down on the ground as soft as your surroundings... a frosted cake of pretty sweetness all gathered together just down the lane or even in your backyard under the flowering pear tree...

for an intimate party

a picnic

a pretty picnic...

meet me on Monday afternoon, right here

"meet me for a pretty picnic"

xo + pretty picnic blessings,

I needed some color in the dining room, so this corner hutch was brought into the dining room to hold my favorite collection of antique Mexican pottery...

i love the bird motif — each one hand painted -

the smaller dessert plates are corralled into a lined basket — along with a plate we unearthed when digging in the ground here at the farm... it has a large chunk taken out of the bottom... so that's why it's in the back

these old blue mason jars are great for a quick flower arrangement or to hold some silver ice cream spoons and knives...

this bowl was my grandmother's when she was alive... it's English... and so delicate...

i dream of making pottery someday... i love how Mexican pottery is hand done... rustic... personal... and hand crafted...

on the bottom shelf I am displaying some of my collection of antique French linens...

overall... it's doing the trick... for now at least... and I love having the little pillow Maria gave me as a gift, sitting on my son's high chair... it really is the best smelling lavender pillow...
(I might be tiring of the red fabric I slip covered on my dining room chairs though... if this baby doesn't come soon... maybe I should just re-do them no?)

have a wonderful day!
xo+blessings,

Starting Monday...
I will be posting another Lenten series entitled "3 steps... to a better me"

These posts entitled "3 steps... to a better me" are written with a particular purpose, a special meaning, and a deliberate spirit to help enhance who I am.

These posts will not, by any means, create a "someone" I want to be. Why? Because I don't want to be first lady, or some famous writer, or a tv show host. Who I want to become is a better version of who I already am. There are so many faults I have. So many failings. So very many...
so who do I want to be? just plain ol' me
embracing who I am and using the gifts God gave me

I have made extremely bad choices... and that is exactly what they were... choices... and what they still are
There is this thing that I absolutely love about life: freedom.

This freedom is within each and every one of us. This is how even Christ Himself was able to be enslaved in this flesh and blood while living here upon this Earth. He knew He had to suffer as He did... and this time during Lent I am always reminded of this... and I fight it...

I fight this flesh and blood... sometimes I don't want it... I want to soar bodiless with Him in heaven... in only spirit

and then I realize I can do that now... that all I have to do is let myself go of this world and soar

Feeling a bit ill this week, and only wanting solitude because of it, I was very much grounded right where I am... all I want to do is sew that ottoman I made, but there was this totally cute, severely needed to nurse all day for some reason baby in my arms... I just wanted to be in that studio and sew and listen to the birds, and make my tea, and just well: be me. Truthfully, it was a 'fake me' that I wanted. Seriously... can you hear the whining?

The purpose of these posts is to bring solace, healing and hope to hearts... enlightenment to minds... strength to wills.

Yes, it will be focused on me, not individuals who read these posts... I cannot address anyone else... that's the person I know the most;)

So what will be in these posts?? This '3 steps... to a better me'? ??

• First we will discover how to reclaim that self respect.
• Second, we will learn how to accept what is given to us... and call it a blessing.
• Thirdly, we will understand what our calling is and learn how to fulfill that purpose.

I have a lot at stake making this place we call "Farm" a place to treasure
like a tabernacle I want to empty myself and fill only Him with His love and accept
accept me
accept all the blessings both in sacrifice and joy
but first... the sacrifice
like the quickly passing days upon this Earth, I only have a short amount of time to live life to the fullest I could easily fill myself with "me" but that would be selfish
so I'm going to fill myself with Him, through sacrificing myself completely see you Monday...
(well, maybe Sunday too... with a b/w photo:) xo+spiritual blessings,

So how did you all do editing your homes over the weekend??
If you started making progress... that's good... but don't let it stay that way...
seriously... get rid of anything that doesn't mean something to you...
the thing about styling your own home, is to have it reflect you...
how do you achieve this??

buy what you love put odd characteristics together
I don't shop at Home Goods or Hobby Lobby for decor items... that just isn't me
I just sort of do whatever feels organic...
like when Gilberta started laying her eggs this past month, it seemed only right to put them out for display...

but it doesn't have that 'punch'
maybe it's because I have five kids and STILL expecting the sixth but whatever the reason... the eggs under the cloches just isn't what I'm thinking...

this is more of what I'm thinking:

via: trine thorson


via: Andres Schonnemann
I'm no professional... and my idea of 'style' is evolving it seems into an area that I didn't know existed!


via: living inside
I used to be all about antiques, but now, it seems, that I would like to add more eclecticism into the decor... some bold colors... just pops — keeping the background neutral — in white and tan...
just as life evolves, so can your style
LET IT HAPPEN!
the worst thing you can do is get in a rut... and not try adding a new look
if you like that large glass turquoise vase at the thrift store for $5 — buy it -
if you want to add an old school blackboard to your living room wall — do it
if you like all your kitchen utensils packed away for a change and nothing on your counters — super!
TRY a NEW style... by just editing what you have...

though my hands may be calloused from working around this farm in the summer, winter time they are inside tending more towards the interior once spring really comes, that fresh bouquet of flowers are just the right accent (like in this photo — with the peonies on the coffee table) 

via: amelia1
let's see where this will go...
xo+blessings,

vintage leather is THE best... already softened and the quality... you can't beat it (for the most part)
I have had this jacket for years — and when I saw these cowboy boots made in Kansas at the local thrift store, I couldn't believe they were only $4 and matched my coat perfect. (looks like it matches the congas in the background too)

I think I am finally done with preparation for the May event...
These mini-journals have been so fun to create and hand sew... I love sitting in this old farmhouse, and listening to an old record, with my feet up and a cup of tea and creating these for you, at the sale...

hope you had a great weekend... our son liked his gift... the survival kit... he came down this morning with it all decked out, filled, and slung over his shoulder... ready for the day
— are YOU ready for the day? -

I am!
xo+blessings,

wherever you are on this journey of life, whether a believer in Christ or not, taking time to better oneself is always necessary...

walking through these next forty days (more on that in a minute) as being a caretaker of the earth, the land beneath us, we will be able to rest within and let the power of God work within us

There is no more time to decide on what to give up, now is the time... (back to the walking...)

our human nature always let's us know there is more time, but when you have to plant a garden, you have to do it at just the right time, just after the frost or a bit before, depending on what you are growing, but you certainly can't plant pepper seeds in the cold hard ground in zone 4 in April, the ground is too cold and they will not even germinate. If you have forgotten to plant that pepper plant by seed, at the right time, then there is always the local nursery, where you can pick up usually a plant with a pepper already growing on it. There are plenty of times where this has happened to me, for whatever reason, but I ran instead of walked in the garden. To run into lent is like picking up that pepper plant in the store with it's fruit ready to pick. It is a lazy way to garden (unless physical ailments prevent you from starting it from seed). The cost if more, the work was not done by you, but here you are enjoying the fruit. Quite frankly, it is cheating your way through gardening. At the end of the forty days, each and every one of us, should arrive with a stronger sense of our weaknesses and strengths because we spent so much time in prayer and fasting.

That ground we are planting in, if all we plant are peppers in there, year after year, will become unsuitable for planting. It needs crop rotation. It might even need time to lie fallow (left alone).

Rotating crops helps not only prevent insect infestations, but also enriches the soil. So one year we'll plant peppers, the other year maybe some carrots or potatoes (something growing deep within the ground). Just as we are as humans. Sometimes we are left barren and it needs to be that way. Other time though, we need to remove what is there for a time to focus on introducing a new virtue or habit within us. Fasting helps us with this.

We are such pleasure seeking people with our comfort of food and drink (myself included). After all, we need food and drink to sustain us, but why not live without that comfort.

That seed we put into the ground is restraining the life within it. It is dry and brittle, and so small. When that outer skin on the seed falls off and dies within the ground, then life pushes forth.

After this time of soil preparation, and barren land, let us all let life push us forth.

Many of my new interests seem to include calligraphy, floral art, feminine and light clothing, and a touch of gold. Some of that may be due to the May sale approaching and I am planning my space, the feel and the overall design. I am really looking forward to once again working with my younger sister in that bakery of ours. She completely sold out of all her wonderful baked goods (and quite frankly, I wasn't surprised... those baked giant pumpkin doughnut holes were amazing!) I do think she is planning on including some special items, such as myself, like candy — no added 'goo' or colors... just natural and a small treat.

One might think that I eat sweets all the time, but on the contrary. I tend to make them for the family, and I do enjoy them from time to time, but oh my hips if I kept making them and eating them, you could definitely then call me 'big mama'. Funny enough, when I am a Grandma (if I am a Grandma) I want to have some meat on my bones and be cuddly... not a skinny one... but that is besides the point, and I don't want to rush those cuddly squeezes yet — not by a long shot. I want to savor this day and all the rest.

However, days are hard, and diving into motherhood, when I hate diving, has lately put me in a state of flux. Not being able to make decisions is one of them (and I suppose Pinterest isn't helping me in that fact either). The days are too long some days, and too short the others. My zeal... the 'oomph' has left me lately. I know the good Lord knows what He is doing. Keeping quiet. Keeping still. I don't get talked to by the Lord like I hear so many women proclaim. That they 'hear the Lord' speak to them. Truthfully, I do hear the Lord in Church, and when I do happen to make decisions that are important (that little 'no no' or 'nudge nudge').

In my mind there are days when I am elsewhere... sometimes that is dreaming of me being an artist in my barn (when i can't paint a lick) or other days it is in a bit of quiet contemplation (when I usually end up knitting or crocheting).

There are those pictures that are so unlike me, yet, I gravitate toward them like it is what I do see in my head, and being a stylist, I see things that way... the light... how they captured the dress just so beautiful... or the cake just at the right level and color in both the foreground and the background...

It seems today is a bit of ramble... and that might be due to the fact that my journal near my bedside has been empty since i don't remember when. It is very unlike me not to write, to journal, etc. Life is so full sometimes, and that fullness is both of the good and of the bad, we just have to accept it all because it is in our life. But if you choose to focus on the bad more than the good, then, well, you just don't see things as a blessing, but of darkness. I find it really poignant that the Lord made the Light first... and that the sun is an enormous star... and just those two things could keep my mind occupied the rest of the day. Finding inspiration from that golden sun is one of the reasons I am liking the gold, the rest is quite uncertain, but I am enjoying the process within my soul finding out the reasons the "why" of the rest.

bread is common place... a consumption practically everyday, but there are times, I do not want to bother with pans and all that... just a rolled dough and a natural shape
being that we are a larger family, gloriously large, someone besides myself are always in the kitchen

the workings of school in the background, after coming to me for the "professional" assistance he needed, kept my youngest daughter anticipating my arrival back to her schoolwork after the bread was taken out... such as the days here... a constant ebb and flow
and some surprising shenanigans

photo bomb #1

photo bomb #2
though I thought otherwise a long time back, having these children, and keeping busy for them, is the most rewarding thing I have and every will be
it is who I am
their mother... their teacher... their French bread baker...

xo+ big family blessings,